The Blessing In My Pain

000_6910RetouchMy father once said: “If there is a God, then why is life so hard?”

Every night I pray for His salvation, but I also wish he could see how God can use difficulties to strengthen our character and teach us valuable lessons if we let Him.

Had it not been for addiction, I would not know the sweetness of serenity.
Had it not been for rage, I would not have the tools to stay calm.
Had it not been for self-pity, I would not know the satisfaction of empowerment.
Had it not been for grief, I would not be able to appreciate happiness.
Had it not been for chaos, I would not know the joy of peace.
Had it not been for confusion, I would not know the wonder of clarity.

Living with addiction, rage, self-pity, grief, chaos, and confusion is what made God relevant to me. Serenity, empowerment, joy, peace, and clarity are some of the benefits of that decision.
It’s in our weakest moments that God usually appears biggest to us.

For some it’s a catastrophic life event like an illness, loss of a loved one, or the downward spiral of addiction.

Unfortunately for others God becomes real on their deathbed; their weakest moment arrives with only days, hours, or sometimes minutes left until they slip into eternity. But the ultimate tragedy is when eternity knocks at an unexpected hour and it’s too late.

I pray for my father and others like him that God would appear ‘big’ to them sooner rather than later.

Jodie Stevens

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