You Are Real

When I was a child I loved reading The Velveteen Rabbit (Margery Williams 1922). It’s a story about a child’s toy that longs to be ‘Real.’ “What is REAL?” asked the Rabbit one day. “Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?” “Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin…

How Education Almost Ruined My Mind

“Creative minds have always been known to survive any kind of bad training”  (Anna Freud). I’m 10 years old and really excited. I’m in fourth grade and it’s field trip day. Our class is going to visit the Super Computer! Now this is a fancy machine with a program that will tell you what you’re…

Have You Ever Completely Missed the Point?

“Tell the people of Jerusalem, Look your king is coming to you. He is humble, riding on a donkey-riding on a donkey’s colt” (Matthew 21:5). What happens when God’s will doesn’t line up with ours? It’s tempting to give up isn’t it? I’ll admit I’ve wanted to ‘throw in the towel’ more than once. There…

This is One Thing That Could Be Drowning out God’s Voice

“Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe” (Proverbs 29:25). The fear of man has tripped me up in more ways than I can count. One of the biggest problems it’s caused me is a lot of confusion and difficulty in making decisions. When I…

Will Time Ever Be on My Side?

“You, Lord, in the beginning laid the foundation of the earth, And the heavens are the work of Your hands.  They will perish, but You remain; And they will all grow old like a garment; Like a cloak You will fold them up, And they will be changed. But You are the same, And Your years…

The Void Where Shame Hides

I used to experience deep feelings of emptiness. I could be in a room full of people and still feel alone. Somewhere along the line I had created a shell, a ‘false front’ I wanted people to see instead of the real me. In a radio interview on Focus on the Family I heard author…

False Guilt and Shame

Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation without regret, but worldly sorrow brings death (2 Corinthians 7:10). Psychology today defines guilt as: a feeling of responsibility or remorse for some offense, crime, wrong, etc., whether real or imagined. Shame is defined as: the painful feeling arising from the consciousness of something dishonorable, improper, ridiculous,…

The Only One Worthy Enough to Throw Stones is the Only One Who Doesn’t

  It’s easy to judge others harshly for their sins, while soft peddling our own. I’ve carried around shame inflicted by condemners, and I’ve been a condemner a few times too! However, we were not given the authority to condemn. That’s Gods job. It also means we don’t really have the authority to internalize the shame others can…

Grace: The Best Bargain of All

Match making sites are full of people searching for true love; the kind that’s unconditional. Casinos are packed with gamblers hoping to win millions without earning it. Advertisements are constantly promoting ‘free gift with purchase,’ or a ‘no cost consultation.’ Who doesn’t want something for nothing? I’d love to win the lottery, even though I didn’t earn…

You Are Not Unlovable

It wasn’t until I began exploring the topic of shame that I realized I’d felt unlovable most of my life. I wasn’t consciously aware of, it was just below the surface of everything I did; like trying to earn everyone’s approval, or not really playing an active role in who my friends were (letting my relationships…

But, Because of Jesus (Shame is Finished)

“Looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God” (Hebrews 12:2). Even though he didn’t sin, Jesus felt shame when he took ours upon himself and was…

How Shame Gave Birth to Blame (and How to Let Them Both Go)

Shame gave birth to blame a long time ago. We find it in the book of Genesis a few pages past, “In the beginning” and “Let there be light.” (Genesis 1:1-3). Satan tempts Eve by getting her to ‘doubt God’s goodness’ (Genesis 3:1-6). Then Eve shares the perilous fruit with Adam and “their eyes were…